That said- I'm tired. Just mom worn out. Ryan mentioned that a colleague asked him to stay longer and let him sleep for 3 hours before he worked through the night on his shift. Ryan says he told him, "Buddy. I have to get home. My wife and kids have not seen me." So charming that he thought of me. Sometimes it's hard to remember the last time I had 3 hours of really good sleep. I know, I'm sounding like a wimp. I'll spare the details of my slumberless children. As for today, Ryan won't be home til tomorrow. (He's on Q4, meaning every 4th night he stays over at the hospital. He comes home tomorrow and then needs to sleep to recover and so for me it feels like every 3rd day I have him around in the evening. And, yes, I know I'm a wimp and people have it worse.)
Today I dragged myself around errands and life and my carpenter came to fix the trim on my floor. He came at "nap time" and I was too busy to get them off to beds. I tended a friend of Emma's until 5 pm, and then onto dinner, and then I sat down to nurse the baby and I fell asleep. With a house full of children. This is where I should be fired. I KNOW.
And while I was sleeping, the containers that had been left out from the work being done in the pantry were Landon's heaven- he went to town on them. 5lbs of flour, 24 ounces of yellow cornmeal and half a container of brown sugar. Everywhere. A light mist of dust. Everywhere.
I awoke to Emma whispering, "Mommy. Landon's dirty."
I didn't even get mad. I just sighed. I knew I should have been better and more careful. And yes I cried a tear. (Okay, a few tears.) It was such a mess. And my vacuum stopped suctioning today. I had to use the shop vac. It took me almost 2 hours to clean up the dust from seemingly every surface on the first floor.And since I am confessing, I also thought I lost Tanner. He went to play outside and went too far. I knocked on doors and finally found him. But I was shaking. And he felt bad. And then I was mad.
And all the while I was cleaning up, after I found Tanner, I kept thinking, "It should be illegal to have 3 kids in 3 years." (Okay, 3 years and 2 months, but still.) And who thought I was qualified? I sat Jacks in his bumbo (thanks again Sara) to vacuum and when I got back to him, he too was covered in a fine sugary dust from the vacuum exhaust. I kissed his neck and fat cheeks and told him never to get into the flour. He better remember.
16 comments:
Ummmmmm..........that was a huge mess you had to clean up! Maybe Landon is destined to be a gourmet cook! I'm so glad you are using the Bumbo. We loved ours. I sent one to Summer this week, she should get it next week. I hope she likes it too. Let's catch up soon. I hope you are planning on going to the tea party in January. I'm craving a little Lacey in my life :)
Oh Lacey, you're too hard on yourself! What a great mom these adorable kids have. I really was feeling for you while I read that. Days like that are so deflating. I'm glad today is a new day, I'll be thinking of you, and hoping it goes better.
Oh Lacey!!!
I am so sorry! I am glad that you did not get mad at any of your brood- and that also means not getting upset at yourself. Your plate is sooo full give yourself a little bit of slack.
We get a chance each new day to start over (or make new mistakes :)).
You see, this is what makes you a good Mom!! You're reaction to your kids was perfect. I am so sorry about the mess though.
oh my goodness! Lacey, was all of this going on when I called you?! You sounded so calm on the phone. I actually have to say you have handled that disaster better than I could ever imagine. I would have burst into tears and screamed and yelled until I was hoarse! You are an example to me. You deserve Nashville in a few weeks, that's for sure!!
Oh Lacey - I'm crying for you...I feel your exhaustion...I think I would've been sent straight to a "home" after that.
I'm sooooo Sorry! If it help I can pretty much say "I know EXACTLY how you feel". I think I feel like you do 100% of the time. I keep asking Aaron..."will it ever end?" and when it does, the $$$ better be worth all my hard work, sleepless nights, and single parenthood!!
My heart goes out to you. I do have days like this but don't seem to handle them quite as good as you described yourself. You are a hero for having children all while supporting your busy husband. The rest of us have NOTHING to complain about. Love Katie
I really don't know whether to laugh or cry, so I did a little of both. I have so been there--except it was someone climbing up onto my countertop and opening all the canisters and spilling things everywhere--flour, rice, brown sugar, sugar, and popcorn kernels. All because I fell asleep.
I would never fire you though--and I am so impressed that you took pictures. And blogged about it. I always forget in the moment that one day it will be funny and not so painful.
You are doing such a good job as "momma". One day it will all be over and those you have loved will eternally love you for your sacrifice and the angels in heaven will call you blessed. For, that is what you are.
There is hope Lacey--I too had 3 in 33 months--3 sweet little girls. I didn't have the pantry mess to remember--but I do remember other hard things--I used to park in the handicapped spot and then defy anyone to say I wasn't handicapped--with 3 in carseats. I remember once trying to get you all out of the car in a noah and the ark downpore and all of us being completely and totally soaked--actually I also remember that I couldn't stop laughing--what had I been thinking. I survived it too--like you. Stay the course--you are already ahead of the curve.
i have been there lacey. right there. we are often doing too much and saying yes too much and thinking about all of the things we didn't get done. you do a great job and don't be so hard on yourself. i feel for you. naps like the one you took on the couch always feel so good too :) it's just a bummer when we crash like that there is always waaaaay too much to wake up to :)
What could I possibly say? Speachless! Know I love you and you are AMAZING! Don't you dare say you should be fired! I had that horrible day with Izzy and the poop....uh and that was only 1! You let me cry and were so sweet to me. If I were there I would have cried with you and then helped clean up! Know Lacey, you are so loved!
Lacey, I was visualizing the whole event and came to myself, felt a heavy heart for you and even teared up (if you know me at all that is a big deal - when I'm not pregnant or postpardum). I decided I needed to write you and tell how truly sorry I am that you did not have so much fun today. Then I saw all the comments from others who love you and decided you would be okay - because so many people love you! I am excited to see you one day. As of November 5th, I will only be 4ish hours away from Boise - so, Grant's school pending, I could see you whenever you come for a visit.
hey lacey-it's Loralee (shawna's cousin, ann packard's daughter). I FEEL FOR YOU!!! YOU ARE NOT ALONE!! And after what I've read on your blog, there is no way you should be fired :)
And here's a story to help you feel better (I promise it's worth your time) and maybe, possibly, laugh:
http://batheticallybeecroft.blogspot.com/2008/09/one-of-those-days-not-for-squimish.html
Lacey Honey,this is one of your best blogs. This IS life. Sometimes we do feel like things like this only happen to us. this is one of those moments that you will talk about and laugh about for years.It WILL bring back sweet memories. I still have the most beautiful and the sweetest grandchildren in the whole world
Okay, Now I can read your blog again. This makes me feel so much better. I agree with Mom Williams - one of your best posts ever!
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